Adam Sandler The Buffoon And The Dean Of Admissions Lyrics

"And now a buffoon's meeting with the dean of admissions at a prestigious college."

[Dean:] "Well Michael, I would like to extend my warmest congradulations
on your upcoming graduation and I understand
you are interested in matriculating here in the fall."

[Buffoon:] "I got a snake, man!"

[Dean:] "Yes, pets are welcome here on campus.
Be it the traditional dog, or cat, or even the occasional reptile."

[Buffoon:] "One time I fed it some beer man! It was slithering this way and that!
It was all fucked up!"

[Dean:] "I'm sure it was.
Well we discourage inappropriate drinking among both students
and pets here on campus."

[Buffoon:] "Fuckin' Shit!"

[Dean:] "Yes, that's a not uncommon reaction to this policy.
So tell me a little bit more about your background."

[Buffoon:] "My father's a fucking asshole, man!"

[Dean:] "Hmm, I see. Your feelings of rebelion are not unusual at your age son."

[Buffoon:] "My mother's a piece of shit too!"

[Dean:] "Well, I hope you can find an outlet for your hostility
over the summer so you can come to school in the fall relaxed
and ready to learn."

[Buffoon:] "My teacher in high school was a stupid bitch, man!
She had her head way up her ass!"

[Dean:] "Well the quality of the faculty at a University
such as ours far exceeds that of a local public high school."

[Buffoon:] "Your secretary's a real fat bitch, man!"

[Dean:] "Yes, she's tried many diets over the years with minimal success."

[Buffoon:] "I had diarhea last month. I had to shit all fucking day!"

[Dean:] "Uh huh, Well we all get the occasional stomach bug,
never a pleasurable experience.
So have you given any thought to your choice of major?"

[Buffoon:] "I've got a big fucking boner right now."

[Dean:] "I see. Well sexual arrousal is not uncommon during periods
of nervous tension. I do not take offense."

[Buffoon:] "One time I ate my neighbors shit!"

[Dean:] "That's understandable. Well, I enjoyed meeting you.
We'll be sending you our decision by the end of the month."

[Buffoon:] "I bet you got really hairy balls."

[Dean:] "Yes, it's a veritable forest down there. Bye bye."

A Out Of Tune Lyrics

You're always fighting everyone
You were wroung when you were young
You love to think you're on the run

I had to laugh at all your jokes
Had to tremble 'cos you smoked
But you never ever get my vote, yeah!

You're the ones to run from, or so they say
I remember you back in the day
Did my best to keep out of the way
You kicked it up in school
Singing out of tune

While you're fighting everyone
I've been hanging in the sun
There's a million things I've done

You're the one who took the lead
Me least likely to succeed
Different now don't you agree

You're the ones to run from, or so they say
I remember you back in the day
Did my best to keep out of the way
You kicked it up in school
Singing out of tune
Thought you ruled the world
Singing out of tune

Everybody, keep out of his way
Everybody, keep out of his way
Everybody, keep out of his way
Everybody, keep out of his way

You're the ones to run from, or so they say
I remember you back in the day
Did my best to keep out of the way
You kicked it up in school
Singing out of tune
Everybody knew
Singing out of tune

Singing out of tune (a lot!)